I used to look upon the world,
feel its stark, rejecting glare
see revealed, in its eyes
reflected otherness and despair,
with a ball of fire overhead,
exposing for all to see
the pitiful attempts to hide
the bottomless-hollow in me.
Day after day, I trudged and hid
an outcast all alone
waiting for the blanket-cloud,
to hide that bend-back, all aglow.
For on those days of dusk I saw
a mirror – of quite a different shade
those eyes now showed, a different scene
in that inviting-light of gray.
For in its gentle soothing haze,
the shadow had revealed,
What in its harsh unbending blaze,
the light had concealed;
A rooftop upon the world,
the blanket-cloud became;
the dim-lit beauty all around
could not help but lose disdain.
For shades of blues and browns and grays,
now thrashing to and fro,
swirl around me, a cool embrace!
enveloping my soul.
And then, as a whisper, it would begin,
promising tales of hope,
of another, just like me,
with whom to sail my journey forward.
It beckoned to the ocean,
that stood above my head
“Come swim and fly and dance
wherever you were meant to tread!
Raise a crew, adventure on,
and no longer shall you sorrow –
for with your meant companion,
you shall begin tomorrow!
See! Just beyond the bend,
beneath the willow tree,
your future lies,
unending love, your proper destiny!”
and so I stood enraptured,
inhaling that potent mist,
beneath that blanket-cloud – entranced!
my heart aflutter from her kiss.
but then –
the fiery knife had torn all asunder!
the spells all shattered!
the dreams all gone!
and once more it gleamed,
naked and unyielding.
of a soul alone –
of an unfitted piece –
of a forever broken whole.